People will tell you that writing is a grueling, miserable occupation, that should only be undertaken by the strong of heart and the bulletproof. They’ll tell you that you have to born a writer, and if you lack that certain something (they never know what it is) you’ll be mediocre at best. They’ll also tell you that the earth is 4,000 years old and racism is a myth, so don’t believe a fucking word they say.

Every single one of you can make people come using just your words. Okay, you can’t force them, but you can inspire, excite, and entice them. You can seduce them, arouse them, and make them fall off their chairs laughing. And if you really want, you can probably make them come and laugh at the same time. Writing is a skill like any other, and you can learn it. You can learn to tell stories, you can learn to form great sentences, and you can learn to turn people on.

It may take courage, and it will definitely take work, but if you want to write dirty things you’re in good company. Some of the greatest people in the world have sex, and many of them write about it as well. This book will show you how.