Sometimes I think that the kink fandom is pretty much like every other. Some people like to dress up and go to cons. They want to be a part of everything, do everything, and they love the social aspect of getting together with other fans to play games in public.
And some people want to enjoy it in the privacy of their home with a few friends, or maybe do some LARPING in the woods near their house. Or the basement as the case may be. They have a few friends they talk about it with, and it’s a fun weekend hobby where they get to nerd out without thinking about the outside world.
And some folks just like to think about it, read about it, watch it, and find their own pleasure in their simple enjoyment of the thing. Maybe it’s a guilty pleasure, or maybe it’s just something they come back to on occasion like an old friend they adore, but don’t get to see all that often.
And, of course, some folks want to argue about it, fight about it, and tell you that you’re not a true fan and you have it all wrong.
Don’t listen to those people.
“There are a hundred ways to kneel and kiss the ground…”