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Threesome photo by Guy New York

I remember in college a random dude on my hall saying something like, “No one has ever actually had a threesome. People just talk about it.” And I’m sure I sounded like an asshole telling him I had probably had five or six? It was hard to count but they were fun and pretty easy and one of my favorite things when it comes to sex.

And he looked at me like I was crazy and I didn’t know what to say because trying to prove a claim like that would just make it worse.

But that night I went upstairs to see the girl I was fucking (she insisted we weren’t dating for the six months we hung out) and she had a friend over. So we got drunk on bad wine and looked out the window at the quad as we lolled about on the couch until I told them about my conversation. And that was really all it took.

He started kissing her neck and she just looked at me and shrugged. So I kissed the other side of her neck as she fell into the couch pillows between us. He pulled off her shirt, I pulled off his shirt, and we must have just kissed for an hour. Sure there were hands on bodies, and some serious grinding going on, but it took a long time before he knelt on the floor between us and began moving back and forth between sucking my dick and eating her pussy.

She laughed and held my hand as we watched him and it was funny and ridiculous and amazing all at the same time. When he finally climbed back onto the couch with his cock in his hand and an eager smile that let us know he thought a reward was due, I simply positioned myself behind her as she sucked his cock and we fucked like we usually do. I leaned over her so I could watch, because what’s the point of a threesome if you don’t get a close-up view of your girlfriend sucking a beautiful cock? And course what’s the point of having a beautiful cock in your face if you don’t get to suck it too and my god the expression on her face as she watched me lick him from tip to balls while I somehow managed not to slip out of her.

I came pretty darn quickly after that, because…well because it was fucking hot. And then she lay down on her back with her head on my lap as he moved between her legs, tasting her one more time before sliding a condom on and then fucking her slowly for the next hour. They kissed and I tousled his hair, but he moved inside her as she begged for it harder, and it felt so normal I almost forgot what they were doing.

She managed to make herself come through some deft finger work and demanding he lift her hips up and hit her in just the right spot with his beautiful cock. She clenched around him and stopped laughing as she came, her other hand gripping mine the whole time. I kissed her eyes and brushed her hair back and she kept on coming, which finally pushed him over the edge too. If I remember right, he did the old pull out, throw the condom somewhere quick, and then come all over her stomach and breasts.

And it was sweet and hot and fun and easy and as we lay there covered in sweat and some come and maybe a bruise or two, I realized that maybe I loved her even if I wasn’t supposed to say it. Not because she fucked her old friend, but because there wasn’t a single moment of fear or doubt all evening, and if that isn’t grace then I don’t know what is.

The next morning the dude on my floor walked by me with some friends and yelled at me from halfway across the lawn, “have any good threesomes lately?”

And I gave him the finger and smiled and there wasn’t anything that needed to be said after that.

Sometimes people have threesomes, and sometimes they’re easy as pie and more fun than a bathtub of puppies. And my god, could those two fuck.